Can’t Be Taken Back

April 13, 2017

I didn’t realize that I could still cry myself to sleep at my age, but apparently I still had it in me.

Had a big fight with my sister, and about the laundry, of all things. And despite using a joking tone, I said something that really offended her. As a result, she says that she’s leaving for her home in Quezon City this Easter weekend… And she’s taking her son with her, and they’ll never visit ever so as to no longer bother me about the extra laundry.

I said sorry, but the damage was already done. Foot into mouth, as usual. Even my father got angry at me, and how I was being such a stick in the mud for complaining about something as trivial as extra laundry, and how because my sister was still family, of course I should also do her share. It’s all too much…

And then, and then I realized that, with my sister leaving with her kid, and with tatay staying over there on weekdays, the house’s will go back to being quiet… And lifeless. And with just ol’ me as the place’s occupant.

I found the thought of being left alone in the house to be terrible and so, so lonely.

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